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【面談する側】面談時の『沈黙』が待つ沈黙かどうかを考える

【面談する側】面談時の『沈黙』が待つ沈黙かどうかを考える

役職が付くと部下と面談をする機会があります。その時に気を付けなければならないのは『自分の意見・答えを言わずにしっかりと相手の話を聴いて同調し問題を深堀して自分で気が付かせる』のが大切と言います。

例えば「どうも調子が悪くてすぐ風邪をひく」と言ってきた場合、「身体を動かして鍛えよう」とか「しっかり食べてよく寝よう」などアドバイスをしたくなると思います。そうではなくて「それは大変だね…。なんで調子が悪くなるの?」とか「どうしてすぐ風邪を引いてしまうと思う?」といった問いかけをして問題を多角的に見ていくことで気づきが生まれます。ほんとうはスキル不足を感じていて無理に夜遅くまで勉強をしているのかもしれないですし、仕事に不安があって寝れないのかもしれないです。そうなると上司として対策をしなければいけないことが見えてきます。

ということでよく話を聴いて問題の本質に気が付いてもらうということをしなければならないのですが、そうなると相手主導で話をしてもらう必要があるため相手の喋り待ちという状況が出てくると思います。つまり沈黙が生まれます。今回はこの沈黙について紹介します。

本題


沈黙には主に4つ種類があります。

①喋り終えた後の沈黙

②不機嫌な時の沈黙

③考えているときの沈黙

④意見をしようか迷っているときの沈黙

上記のうち、③と④は待つべき沈黙と言われています。沈黙を嫌う人の場合、耐えきれなくなって喋りたくなってしまうと思いますが、ここはぐっと我慢して相手が喋るのを待ちましょう。

ゴールは問題の本質に気が付いてもらうということだとしっかりと認識し話を聴くことが大切です。喋り過ぎてしまうと感じている人は意識をしてみてはいかがでしょうか?

 

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